Engaging Parents in Their Child’s Cognitive Behavioral Therapy
Engaging parents in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) can make a huge difference in a child’s progress! When parents understand CBT principles and reinforce them at home, kids are more likely to practice and internalize new coping skills.
Below is a summary of some general guidelines for engaging parents in their child’s CBT treatment. I’ll be expanding on these generic principles and discussing how to apply them in the treatment of traumatized youth in the March 21st training.
1. Educate Parents on CBT Basics
Parents don’t need to be therapists but giving them a simple explanation of CBT can help them understand and reinforce the treatment. You might say:
"CBT helps kids understand how their thoughts, feelings, and behaviors are connected. When we change unhelpful thoughts or behaviors, we can improve their coping skills and well-being."
Providing handouts, short videos, or simple metaphors (like “thoughts are like glasses that color how we see the world”) can be helpful.
2. Invite Parents to Participate (Without Taking Over)
Always work with parents within the ethical and legal parameters of confidentiality while actively encouraging a developmentally appropriate level of parent involvement. Balance parental involvement so the child still feels independent in their therapy journey. Options include:
- Brief check-ins at the beginning or end of sessions.
- Parent-only sessions to discuss how to reinforce CBT skills at home.
- Homework assignments that parents and children can work on together.
3. Teach Parents to Model CBT Skills
Kids learn best by example! Encourage parents to use CBT strategies themselves. If a child is working on challenging negative thoughts, parents can model this by thinking out loud:
"I just had the thought, ‘I’m terrible at this,’ but I’m going to challenge it. Maybe I’m just still learning!"
4. Give Parents Specific Coaching on Praise & Reinforcement
Positive reinforcement is key! Teach parents to praise effort, not just results:
- "I love how you used your coping skills when you felt anxious!"
- Instead of "Good job, you didn’t feel anxious!" (since emotions aren’t fully in our control)
They can also use reward systems to encourage CBT skill practice at home.
5. Help Parents Respond Supportively to Challenges
Parents may unintentionally reinforce avoidance by protecting kids from distress. Coach them to respond with empathy while encouraging healthy coping.
- Instead of “It’s okay, you don’t have to go to the birthday party if it makes you nervous,”
- Try: “I know this feels scary, but what small step could we take to make it easier?”
6. Provide Structured At-Home Activities
Give parents simple activities to reinforce CBT concepts, like:
- Practicing relaxation techniques together.
- Using a thought record worksheet during a tough moment.
- Role-playing problem-solving scenarios.
7. Normalize Challenges & Celebrate Progress
Parents may feel frustrated if progress is slow. Reassure them: “CBT is like learning a new skill—it takes time and practice. The fact that your child is trying is already a big success!”
Encourage parents to celebrate small wins, like their child using a coping skill just once, or even recognizing an unhelpful thought. Progress is progress!
Involving parents in the treatment of a traumatized child or adolescent requires a trauma sensitive approach. I look forward to expanding on the above methods and applying them to the specifics of CBT with traumatized youth at our March 21 training.
Registration is available on the School of Social Work, Office of Continuing Education web site: https://socialwork.buffalo.edu/continuing-education/training-registration.html
David M. Pratt, Ph.D., MSW
Licensed Psychologist
Training Faculty, University at Buffalo, School of Social Work, Office of Continuing Education